Short Words
March 06, 2009
by David Krell
david@davidkrell.com
Winston Churchill was right.
The British Prime Minister who inspired the world with his words during World War II said, “Broadly speaking, the short words are the best, and the old words best of all.”
As an example, let’s take an excerpt from his famous speech to Britain’s House of Commons on June 4, 1940.
“The British Empire and the French Republic, linked together in their cause and in their need, will defend to the death their native soil, aiding each other like good comrades to the utmost of their strength.”
Clear. Concise. Purposeful.
But what if we changed it to the following:
“The British Empire and the French Republic, because of their common connection in their cause and in their need, will take the appropriate and necessary measures to properly protect and defend their native soil, even if their actions lead to death, providing the required assistance to each other like good friends to the absolute capability of their strength.”
Wordier. Clunkier. Tiring. (Ok, ‘clunkier’ is not really a word. But you get the idea.)
A writer’s choice of words is a prime factor in a document’s effectiveness. In this excerpt, Churchill makes three choices that strengthen its message.
First, “linked together” conjures an image of an unbreakable chain, unlike our weaker “common connection” phrase that sounds like something we might find on Facebook.
Second, the word “defend” implies that one will both protect and defend something. There is no need to use the phrase ‘protect and defend’ when ‘defend’ suffices. Why use two words when you can use one to make your point?
Third, the word “comrades” is often used in a military setting, the exact reason for the speech. Churchill is letting the world know that France is more than a friend, it is a comrade with whom Britain will shed blood on the battlefield to secure freedom, if necessary.
david@davidkrell.com
Winston Churchill was right.
The British Prime Minister who inspired the world with his words during World War II said, “Broadly speaking, the short words are the best, and the old words best of all.”
As an example, let’s take an excerpt from his famous speech to Britain’s House of Commons on June 4, 1940.
“The British Empire and the French Republic, linked together in their cause and in their need, will defend to the death their native soil, aiding each other like good comrades to the utmost of their strength.”
Clear. Concise. Purposeful.
But what if we changed it to the following:
“The British Empire and the French Republic, because of their common connection in their cause and in their need, will take the appropriate and necessary measures to properly protect and defend their native soil, even if their actions lead to death, providing the required assistance to each other like good friends to the absolute capability of their strength.”
Wordier. Clunkier. Tiring. (Ok, ‘clunkier’ is not really a word. But you get the idea.)
A writer’s choice of words is a prime factor in a document’s effectiveness. In this excerpt, Churchill makes three choices that strengthen its message.
First, “linked together” conjures an image of an unbreakable chain, unlike our weaker “common connection” phrase that sounds like something we might find on Facebook.
Second, the word “defend” implies that one will both protect and defend something. There is no need to use the phrase ‘protect and defend’ when ‘defend’ suffices. Why use two words when you can use one to make your point?
Third, the word “comrades” is often used in a military setting, the exact reason for the speech. Churchill is letting the world know that France is more than a friend, it is a comrade with whom Britain will shed blood on the battlefield to secure freedom, if necessary.